It’s happening again. We’re heading into that time of year when the holidays come at us in a whirlwind—Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas, (and/or whichever winter holiday(s) you celebrate), and New Years. If you’re a parent, you probably feel like this time of year comes with a mile-long to-do list. Between pumpkin patches, Halloween costumes, Thanksgiving feasts, and finding the perfect gifts for Christmas, there’s a lot to juggle. And let’s not forget the ever-present pressure to capture picture-perfect moments for social media.
The Need to Do All the Things (and Get the Perfect Photo While You’re Doing Them!)
Whether it’s photos of your kids in the pumpkin patch, perfectly plated Thanksgiving dinners, or matching pajama shots in front of the Christmas tree, it’s easy to feel like you need to “do all the things” and document them flawlessly. But all that pressure can take the fun out of the season. So, let’s talk about how you can manage the stress and actually enjoy this special time of year—without feeling like you need to turn it into a social media highlight reel.
Halloween: Let Go of the Perfect Pumpkin Patch
The holiday season kicks off with Halloween, which has grown beyond costumes and candy to include pumpkin patches, hayrides, and intricate decorations. And, of course, you’ll see plenty of pumpkin patch photos on Instagram—kids in matching fall outfits, holding the perfect pumpkin with big smiles on their faces.
Here’s the thing: real life doesn’t look like that all the time. Pumpkin patches are often muddy, your toddler might hate their costume, and someone will inevitably spill hot chocolate. Instead of stressing about getting the perfect shot, try to enjoy the experience for what it is—a fun day outside with your family. If the kids aren’t cooperating for a photo, no big deal! Snap some candid shots instead and remind yourself that these imperfect moments are what make the best memories.
Thanksgiving: The Pressure to Cook, Host, and Capture It All
After Halloween, we roll right into Thanksgiving, where the pressure to “do all the things” really starts to ramp up. The big meal, the perfectly set table, family traditions, and, of course, getting a great family photo between bites of turkey.
For parents, Thanksgiving can feel especially overwhelming. Between cooking (or coordinating who’s bringing what), keeping the kids occupied, and making sure everything goes smoothly, it’s easy to burn out. And then there’s the added pressure of trying to take a beautiful family photo that somehow makes it look like everything is calm and perfect.
The key to enjoying Thanksgiving is to let go of perfection. So what if your pie doesn’t look like it came from a magazine? What matters most is the time you spend together. Set aside some time for yourself, ask for help in the kitchen, and most importantly, give yourself permission to skip the “perfect Thanksgiving post.” Focus on the moments that matter—like catching up with family and friends—and let the rest go.
Christmas: The Gift-Giving, Decorating, and Picture-Perfect Chaos
Then, before you know it, it’s Christmas time. And with it comes an entirely new set of pressures—buying gifts, decorating the house, attending holiday events, and (of course) getting the perfect family photo in front of the tree.
For many parents, Christmas is the pinnacle of holiday stress. You want to make the holiday magical for your kids, but the sheer amount of things to do can make it feel overwhelming. Shopping for gifts (and keeping up with what everyone else is buying), decorating the house just right, and attending various holiday events can leave you exhausted.
And while social media can be filled with images of beautifully wrapped presents, cozy living rooms, and kids with delighted expressions as they open gifts, reality is often much messier. By the time Christmas morning rolls around, you might feel like collapsing from exhaustion rather than enjoying the moment.
This year, give yourself permission to scale back. Simplify where you can—whether that’s buying fewer gifts, attending fewer events, or keeping your decorations low-key. Focus on the moments that bring you joy, and don’t worry about capturing everything for social media. The best memories don’t come from perfectly posed photos; they come from laughing, playing, and spending time together, even when things get a little chaotic.
Managing the Pressure to “Do All the Things”
So, how do we manage all this holiday stress? Here are a few tips to help you slow down, breathe, and enjoy this busy time of year without feeling like you’re constantly chasing after perfection.
- Prioritize What Matters Most: You don’t have to do it all. Sit down with your family and decide which activities are most important to you. Maybe it’s visiting the pumpkin patch, but skipping the big Halloween party. Maybe you’ll focus on a few meaningful traditions for Thanksgiving and keep the meal simple. By prioritizing, you’ll have more time and energy for the things that truly matter.
- Set Social Media Boundaries: Social media can be great for inspiration, but it can also make us feel like we’re not doing enough. If you find yourself constantly comparing your holidays to others, it might be time to take a step back. Limit your time on social media, and remind yourself that what you see online isn’t always reality. Focus on your own family’s experience, not what everyone else is posting.
- Embrace Imperfection: The holidays are messy, chaotic, and rarely go as planned. Instead of stressing over every little detail, embrace the imperfections. Maybe your Halloween costumes don’t match, or your Christmas tree leans a little to one side. Those are the things that make the holidays memorable. When you let go of the need to control every aspect, you’ll be able to enjoy the season for what it really is—imperfect, but full of love.
- Practice Self-Compassion: Finally, give yourself some grace. You’re doing the best you can, and that’s enough. The holidays are meant to be joyful, not stressful, so don’t be too hard on yourself if things don’t go perfectly. Take care of yourself, ask for help when you need it, and remember that it’s okay to say “no” to extra events or activities that feel overwhelming.
The Best Holiday Memories Aren’t Perfect
This time of year is filled with opportunities to create wonderful memories, but it’s also easy to get caught up in the pressure to do it all—and to do it perfectly. Whether it’s Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas, or any other holiday, remember that the best moments aren’t the perfectly staged photos. They’re the spontaneous, joyful, and sometimes chaotic moments you’ll cherish forever.
So this holiday season, give yourself permission to relax, let go of perfection, and enjoy the time with your family—on your terms.
Consider Therapy in West County, MO
Yes, we know the pressure may still be on. So, our team of therapists at our Ballwin, MO therapy office is here for you. Want mom therapy? Marriage counseling? Play therapy for children as young as 3-years old? Teen counseling? Men’s therapy? We’ve got you. Our expert therapists at Marble Wellness in the West County area are well equipped and eager to help! Reach out today and get the support you and your family deserve.
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